It's Okay If You Need Meds to Be Okay

this post feels as difficult to share as it feels important. I have been anti medication for myself for my whole life basically.

I have always wholeheartedly supported others on their journey with meds and yet refused to take any myself.

For years when I would have a trauma trigger I would sit with it, feeling like I was drowning alone, my body in utter fucking visceral panic.

I was determined to heal myself and not use medication to help. And I have been putting in WORK to heal myself.

I go to somatic therapy, I go to @goldenrootacupuncture , I have been in containers with @jessicajeanmuir , I have done talk therapy, I get body work by @sacredeyemassage I take @itsbrowngirljane CBD daily along with a slew of other supplements to help support myself.

And all of that is life changing for my day to day anxiety and depression but when my body goes fully into a trauma response it’s not enough.

My heart races and I feel like I’m constantly in danger for no fucking reason.

So this time I asked for help. I asked for something to help relax my body and I could cry right now from the relief I feel.

The way I usually feel during this time is nowhere to be found. My home feels safe. I feel safe. I feel more than safe I feel alive and excited to experience what so many others take for granted.

I was so damn inspired by the post @closetvomitfashion shared yesterday and I felt called to share this journey of mine too.

It is ok to need help. It is ok to ask for help. It is ok to not do it on your own. It is ok to need medication for a day, a week, a month, however long you need it. Mental health struggles and PTSD are fucking hard and we don’t need to make our lives harder because we feel some type of way about medicating.

thank you for listening and holding me as I share this vulnerable story. Sending you all so much love. As always I’m always here if you need to talk 💕

xx
alex